Three Big Fat Lies: Leading Reasons Nurses & APRNs Avoid Their Finances & Try To Outsource

Feb 04, 2024
Three Big Fat Lies: Leading Reasons Nurses & APRNs Avoid Their Finances & Try To Outsource


I hear a lot of nurses & APRNs say, 

"I don’t have the time to manage my own money."

"I don’t have enough knowledge or skill to be in control of my own money."

"A finance expert can do it better." 

I call these the 3 Big Fat Lies.


Why The 3 Big Fat Lies Are Problematic For Nurses & APRNs Trying To Escape Toxic Nursing


These beliefs are major reasons nurses & APRNs give for avoiding their finances, seeking shortcuts, and outsourcing money management to a financial advisor.  

It’s a problem because without knowing how to track your money’s performance you will never feel in control of what’s happening with your money. You’ll never feel confident in your ability to make a change in your career, life, or circumstance. And you’ll always worry that you’re not going to have enough of you’ll run out of money. 

In your life this may look like searching for a quick solution, an app, or an expert to outsource your money management to, and not knowing how to customize your monthly strategy, avoid expensive mistakes, monitor your money plan’s effectiveness, and being stuck in a career longer than necessary.

I’m going to be honest with you. I told myself these 3 Big Fat Lies for a lifetime. These myths were most certainly passed onto me from my family and community. And the financial industry helps entrench them with their promises of free solutions that aren’t free–far from it.  

I locked myself into working with a fee-free financial advisor for almost 13 years. 

And it cost me $300,000+. 👀

My financial advisor told me multiple times throughout our relationship that there weren’t any fees for his service. The 3 Big Lies I was clinging to let me naively believe him.

What Nurses & APRNs Need To Know About The Finance Industry–There’s No Such Thing As Free


Here’s what I learned that I want you to know too. 

Financial advisors, money apps, and money convenience services are making money off your whether you pay them for it directly or not. 

Just in case there’s any question in your mind still about who’s paying for it, I’ll be blunt. 


You will either know you’re paying for it, or you won’t, or you’ll know and not know at the same time. But you are paying. 

Do not ever believe it if an advisor or money service tells you there’s no charge for their service. They have all kinds of ways to spin this, and I’m here to tell you to watch out. 

Here is an actual e-mail conversation I had with my fee-free advisor. 






It’s Easy To Feel Daunted & Confused By Financial Jargon, Concepts, and Advisors


My thoughts after reading this response: ‘Ok, hmph. I’m not the expert, and I totally believe White-Man-in-Expensive-Looking-Suit who’s helped me with my investments for nearly 10 years now. I clearly got something wrong because I don’t understand how to use the online portal or how to read my statements or anything he says because it’s all in financial jargon. I always feel like a stupid idiot when I talk to him. But he’s always reassured me there’s no charge, and I believe him because he’s believable. I believe he has my best interest at heart because he’s a professional working with a big, well known finance company with an excellent reputation.’

If you are thinking, ‘Wow! Your response and line of thinking was pretty lame,’ let me give you 100% permission to do that because I am thinking the same thing. I am actually disappointed in myself when I look back on this. I am a woman with 2 master’s degrees who generally likes math and budgeting and finances! 

I am not a meek person who anyone would describe as a pushover. My husband describes me as a person who never gets embarrassed (not true, I do) and who is never afraid to ask for help with understanding problems. My mistake was I believed I didn’t have the time or the skill to get the most out of my savings so I thought the best solution would be to hire a professional to outsource this work to. 

It would be another year or two before I would make the time to further investigate my gut feeling about the fees. Investment fund fees are sneaky because you commonly won’t see any charge on your account. 

They were still there. Technically White-Man-in-Expensive-Looking-Suit was not charging me a fee for service. So what he told me was true. But what he did instead was invest my money into investment funds that had very high fees. (This is a mistake that’s made commonly and easily with or without a financial advisor.) 

Upon re-review, I thought, ‘This seems really strange, especially given my last email with White-Man-in-Expensive-Looking-Suit who provided reassurance about the lack of fees.’ 

So I emailed him again. 





You better believe we were on the phone together in just a short minute after that. And this time, he validated my calculations.


How The Finance Industry Uses Friendship Trust To Exploit The 3 Big Fat Lies


But there was another factor at play. Over those 13 years working together, I had developed a friendly relationship with my financial advisor. I enjoyed his humor, and catching up on life events. He was a crazy runner like me! Even though we had a purely business relationship, I felt invested in it. Even at this moment when he confirmed to me that, ‘Yes, probably I had paid several hundred thousand dollars in fees during our (“fee-free”) work together, it was not in my mind that I wanted to break up with White-Man-in-Expensive-Looking-Suit. I only wanted for White-Man-in-Expensive-Looking-Suit to bring me an alternative plan that had lower fees. 




Side note: If you’re thinking 18% return, wow! That's awesome. It’s worth it! Think again. The average return at the time for similarly invested folks was in the mid-20s (To be clear, this was during a boom period–bull market in financial jargon– and not typical.) Also, this was taking into account my new cash deposits which is a way I learned advisors make themselves look better on paper. Don’t be fooled!





Here’s an honest thought I had across the 13 years, not just this moment on the phone, ‘I might be able to do this better, but at this point, I don’t feel good about breaking off this relationship we built.’ 

Even at this moment, I did not want to break it off. And you know what else? This is not the first conversation I had with White-Man-in-Expensive-Looking-Suit where he advised me that I could probably invest to build my wealth better if I was managing my money on my own. 

Why Nurses & APRNs Fail When Outsourcing Money Management


I would love nothing more to say that I got cheated or deceived, but I didn’t. I just didn’t put in the work to learn how to monitor my own investments and hold my financial advisor accountable. 

I tried taking a shortcut by outsourcing my money management. And it didn’t work. It didn’t save me time or money like I thought it would. It ended up costing me $300,000 and that is worth about 3-5 years of living expenses for me. 

Soon after this phone conversation, I transferred my accounts and took over my own management. Using the strategy I had learned over the previous years, I felt immediately more confident in understanding my money and like a load had been lifted off my back. 

Making the move was pretty simple, but I did have to send an uncomfortable break up note to my advisor. I didn’t mind transferring my money. I didn’t mind taking responsibility for my own accounts. I absolutely dreaded breaking off this long term relationship. 


I never heard from him again.


Past Money Mistakes Don’t Indicate Future Success


Even though I wish that 25-year-old-Angel wouldn’t have set up 41-year-old-Angel like she did: with a financial advisor a missed opportunity of a few hundred thousand dollars, and the addition of multiple years of work, I can also honestly say that having a financial advisor was not in my worst interest. 

My advisor helped me during the years I clung strongly to the 3 Big Fat Lies and didn’t trust myself to set my own money strategy and manage it.  

I needed the support. I only wish I could’ve found support that would’ve leaned more in my favor.

And this is why I created the Ultimate Nurse Investing Program. So you have support that leans in your favor. You work hard enough for your money and every dollar nurses makes counts. The difficulty of our work means we’re not likely to make it to traditional retirement age. You don’t need your money getting siphoned from your accounts to make banks richer. 


Dismantling the The 3 Big Fat Lies


The next time you find yourself looking for a wealth building shortcut or wishing to outsource your money management, remember the 3 Big Fat Lies. 

 Then do these things instead: 

  • If you feel short on time, ask yourself if you can carve out 1 hour a month to take control of your finances–because that’s all it takes when you follow the right steps.
  • If you feel confused and like you lack the necessary knowledge – how can you learn and what will it take? One reason I love working with nurses & APRNs is that I know you have all the skill it takes to manage your money better than an expert. Making it through nursing school is evidence of that! All you need is the right teacher to lean on.
  • If it’s a belief that a financial advisor can do it better and that outsourcing will solve your problems–remind yourself that you still have to understand what’s happening with your money and have a plan for holding them accountable. Otherwise what seems like a shortcut could end up an expensive, time consuming mistake. 


Do you tell yourself any of these 3 Big Fat Lies? Is there a 4th Big Fat Lie you’d add? A 5th? I’d love to hear. Email me [email protected]




I write about some of the things you need to know on this blog, but what’s most important is not what you know when it comes to finances, it’s what you do. Helping you change your financial behavior and therefore change your life isn’t something I can accomplish just on a blog, but it is what The Nurses Investing For Wealth Method™ that I teach to nurses & APRNs inside the Ultimate Nurse Investing Program. Take the first step with my 2 hour training, "How to Become Work Optional in One Hour a Month–Without Burning Out, Wasting Time on One-Size-Fits All Finance Strategies, or Falling for Bogus Investment Ploys."



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